How to Re-Enter Your Life After Retreat

It probably took some doing to make your retreat happen. 

If you’re like most of us, taking a retreat wasn’t as simple as booking time on your calendar and finding a room to stay in.  You likely had to wrangle with the snarky inner voice telling you that retreats are luxuries or that you’re being selfish.  Then you had to rationalize spending time and money on yourself – this runs counter to your genetic programming and your learned behavior.

Brava, dear one.  Good on you for making your retreat happen.  It was a challenge, and you did it. 

You researched, you planned, you created.  If you went to a retreat center perhaps you budgeted and saved for months.  If yours was a homegrown retreat, you set up circumstances to step out of the ordinary and into intentional space for whatever length of time was do-able and desired.

Your retreat was what you needed to recharge; you reset your thermostat.  You rested, you shook up your routine, you got perspective by turning inward.  At the end of it you find yourself relaxed and renewed. 

So now what?  How do you head back “out there” once your retreat is over?

The return from what you experience on retreat can be disorienting and upsetting if not carefully navigated.  Take time to plan not only your entry but also your departure from retreats of all types, formal and informal.

Here are some tips on transitioning back to your life once you’re ready to leave the cocoon of your retreat.

 

Close the door behind you

Consciously end your retreat; having a hard stop enables you to step away from the temporary container you created for yourself.  The phrase “what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” might apply here … think about what you may not want to share with others, so as to preserve its integrity.  Your time on retreat was sacred; honor it.

Declare to yourself that the retreat is over, and mark it in some way.  You may want to speak it out loud, take a specific physical action or create an image in your journal that evokes closure.  Leave when you have truly closed the door, metaphorically speaking.

Inhabit the buffer zone

Jennifer Louden, in her Women’s Retreat Book, talks about “liminal space”, which is the not-quite-in and not-quite-out phase we walk through on our way back home from retreat.  Consciously inhabit this container as you conclude your experience and begin the process of coming back to ordinary life.  Allow yourself to be somewhere between the ritualized nature of your retreat, and the habitual busyness of your existence.  Do this by moving slowly, gently guiding yourself with encouraging words, and resisting the temptation to drop back into habits like checking email/phone or multitasking. 

Stay present with what’s happening in the buffer zone until you feel strong enough to step back into your world.

 

Small sips

Once you’re back in the saddle, keep your retreat alive by returning to what you discovered there.  Take regular breaks that include an invitation to drop into the spaciousness you experienced, and recall any insight or “aha’s” that surfaced while you were there.  The effects of your retreat are both immediate and gradual; be open to receiving what will show itself to you slowly over time as a result of the experience you created for yourself. 

Building regular retreats into your life is a beautiful way of honoring yourself and deepening your self-knowledge.   With each successive experience you allow yourself, you’ll better understand how to integrate the simple and profound practice of retreat. 

What is your experience with returning home after some time on retreat?  How do you ease the transition?  How do you continue to reap the benefits of retreat once you’re back to your usual schedule and lifestyle?